Steve Nelson

Victims of abuse often wonder, "How does God feel about what I am going through? Does he know how terrified I am? Does he really care that I am hurting? Does he know that I feel so badly — so overwhelmed with grief, that death appears as a welcome end to my suffering and pain?" 

The ultimate question that many are searching answers for is, “Does God really love me?”

The woman who is brought to Jesus for committing adultery — caught in the clutches of depraved church leaders — also needs to see a loving representation of God. She needs to know what true love and forgiveness looks like. And, perhaps you dear reader need that kind of view too.

There was a time that my wife and I suffered horrendous abuse from our former pastor. I remember wondering if God actually approved of the depraved actions this man perversely professed to be true love. He most certainly proclaimed that God approved. He used his position as a spiritual leader, God’s representative, to gain a type of spiritual authority — authority he exploited while standing in the pulpit — authority he perversely twisted regarding the character and nature of our heavenly father. After months of his spiritual, emotional and for my wife sexual abuse, I lost all hope that our marriage would survive. I finally came to the breaking point. I couldn’t take the pressure or pain any longer. All of our hopes and dreams seemed to be slipping through my hands as the world I knew, the one we had shared, was about to end.

I tried to press on, but now could barely see through my tear-stained eyes. “Why God? Why don’t you care? Where are you when I need you most?” This question has been echoed by countless millions who have been forced to endure pain and suffering at the hands of a merciless betrayer.

I still can’t remember all the details of  what happened but, somehow, at that darkest moment, when it seemed that nothing I could do would change the course of destruction our life was on, when I wanted to give up, someone stood between us and final destruction. As I cried out to God, his heart ached too. How does God feel? Your heavenly father loves you with an everlasting love. With loving kindness he travels with you on each painful and difficult step you take. He gave his son to ransom you from a life of hopelessness, pain and suffering. For you my friend I share hope. The God who saved us can save you too. He longs to show you his heart of love and promises to set you free. Won’t you turn to him today? (Stay tuned, part 7 is coming next time.)

(Steve Nelson is pastor at the Seventh Day Adventist Church in Powell.)